BREAKING NEWS – DONALD TRUMP HAS REACHED PEAK HUMAN EVOLUTION!

     It’s official, Donald Trump has become the best human to walk the face of Earth. Everyone loves him, and at no point in his entire life has he made a statement that was factually wrong, controversial, or nonsensical. Not only that, but according to Donald J. Trump, Donald Trump has,” accomplished more in his two years in office than any other president”, and that China loves him for his “very large brain”.

     In an exclusive interview with the ideal human (Donald Trump), he told The Northmont Thunder that he was,” the physical manifestation of God”, and that he mentored Mother Teresa and Gandhi. He also revealed that he was going for office again in 2020, with Kanye West as his running mate.